Express

Express

When I was a child I used to sit and think
About God and stars
About people and life
Why I was created?
Resting on two legs and working with two hands
There I was wondering
Two eyes to see the majestic beauty
Two ears to listen
And a mouth to speak
Moulded in to a unique body
And run by a beautiful mind
I used to see pigeons fly in the sky
I wondered if I could fly
Not with my body
But inside my mind
I dreamed of flying
Crossing the boundaries of fear
But fear was a despot inside my mind
My mouth was shut by opinions
Which were fed over the course of time
None of them original
My lips vibrated when I spoke
They danced on the orders of the imaginary fear
I could see the beauty inside my mind
But I was unable to feel it in real
An unbreakable wall was created
Which kept me away from the clouds
I so wanted to cry then
To let my words express themselves through tears
And to collect them and feel their warmth
It was all a long time ago
I have improved a lot
I am becoming a better actor
My mouth throws words at my wish
The lips don’t vibrate
But the heart still does
It breaks into pieces
Everytime I hear judgements
It feels as if someone is sitting inside
Pressing my heart
But my face is blank
The inside battles are completely hidden
Sometimes when I am alone
I sit in my room
I look outside my window
There is a big tree
I watch it and embrace it as it is
My heart releases a little pressure
I don’t cry
The tears now don’t express
They are dry now
But my hands tremble in excitement
And I pour myself on the blank paper.

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Live

Live

I have been to the depth of my soul
And I have traveled to the boundaries of my mind
I have seen people trapped in life
And I have seen life caged in minds

The stupidity sometimes shine
And the genius often lies
The rich are good actors
And the poor are bad directors

When I walked on the sun
I interacted with my soul on those hills
With bare feet I just walked
I saw the sun going down as I rose up

I realised that there is no sense to all this
All are cooking unhappiness
All are empty inside shouting for love and peace
I jumped into the depths of those hills

My body was sweating and my soul was flying
The answer was on its way
I waited for it to show up and suddenly I woke up
After all, I was thankful that I lived.

Wonder

 

 

Somethings have a soporific effect

They take you to an unknown world

You are in sleep but you are awake

The heart releases vibrations at that time

Which reaches the mind and meets the soul

There is no inimical power there

Everything is just in place

You start drowning

In the veracity of that moment

The child inside you gets ecstatic

With eyes wide open

It looks

You open your eyes and see yourself

You are not you

You see a child

You wonder for a moment

Am I still dreaming?

Somewhere a child is seeing itself as you

And is wondering the same.

Alone…

 

 

It was daytime. I was sitting in my room thinking about life. Suddenly, someone knocked on the door. I stood up and went towards the door. I opened the door but I saw no one. I came back to my room and again started thinking. A few minutes passed and I again heard someone knocking the door. This time also I found no one. I knew someone was pulling a prank. The next time when I heard the knock I just kept sitting. The knocking continued. After few more minutes, I got irritated. I went towards the back gate slowly this time. I opened the window on the other side and got out. I circled my house and walked towards the main door. There was no one there. I went close to the door and I knocked. I thought it was all weird. I again went to the back window and entered my room. I saw a man looking like me lying on the floor dead with his blood spread all over. His face showed a feeling of emptiness and I was standing right there smiling at it.

 

Haunting.

Haunting.

 

 

We played together for hours

Me and my sister

And it started raining

We went running inside our house

Thrashing the wet mud on the way

She said, ‘Wait for me’

I grabbed her arm and we rushed inside

The ecstasy of that moment was mystifying

I still don’t know why but we started laughing

First I laughed and then she imitated me

She tried to laugh in my voice

Those times were so blissful

We didn’t need any reason to laugh

We just laughed

I said, ‘Stop laughing, father is coming’

She kept laughing

And I kept laughing

We rolled on the floor as we laughed

I rolled over to my father’s side

He was talking to someone on the phone

‘Go away’, he said

I and my sister were still laughing

Suddenly, the bliss was gone

As my father slapped me hard on my face

And that was some hard blow I got

My sister stopped laughing and I started crying

It has been 50 years since then

But I still remember it

Every day when I go to sleep

I play that scene in my mind

And I wonder, ‘Why did we laugh so hard that day?’

And I still remember that there was no reason

But the question that haunts me is,

‘Why did my father slapped me?’

Dear God

Dear God

 

Time: 2 PM

Date: 20-11-2017

A Letter came to my house.

The letter read as follows:

 

 

“Dear God,

I have walked on rough roads in life

I have heard fallacious arguments

About your existence or non-existence

I sense and feel that there is a purpose

Why are we living this life?

I faltered at first to ask you this

But now I am caged inside my own mind

There is only one way left

So, I am asking you this question

What is the meaning of life?”

 

 

The date on the letter was 20-11-1987

And it was addressed to me by God.

I ran towards the postman to find the truth.

He vanished into the sky and I never saw him ever again.

I turned the letter and on its backside, there was a picture.

It was my father looking young and handsome.

The letter was written by my father 30 years ago.

I entered his room and sat on a chair.

He was breathing heavily.

He was at the last stage of cancer.

Needles connected all over his body.

He lived as an atheist all his life.

I gave him that letter.

He asked surprisingly, ‘Is there an answer?’

I said, ‘No’.

He then threw the letter away.

I said, ‘There is no answer, but he exists’.

My father smiled and surrendered himself to death.

 

 

 

 

Sand and sun.

Sand and sun.

It was a warm day. The sun was interacting with the soil on the beach. The waves were trying and destroying their conversation by interfering every now and then. A girl was sitting on one side and was observing the water rushing towards her dry feet.
As the water touched her feet, she felt relieved. She thought that the waves were trying to console her. When the water mingled with bruises on her bare feet, she felt like they were getting healed. The sun rays entered her open mouth and fed her.
It has been four days since she had proper food. She managed by eating leftovers thrown in the garbage can. She tried the same today but she didn’t do it. The smell of that garbage flowed inside her head and she decided not to eat.
The whole day passed. The sun went down leaving the dark sky. The girl was still sitting on the beach. The water was a little cold now. A boy came and sat near her.
He asked, ‘what are you doing here? , you should come with me and eat something from the leftovers.’
The girl, with an infuriating face, said, ‘I don’t want to eat that garbage food. Please leave me alone.’

The boy left and the girl too stood up and started walking. She walked on the streets with disappointment. Hunger was not letting her think properly. She saw a man walking out of a restaurant. She went running to him and asked for food.
The man asked the girl, ‘why don’t you go do some work instead of begging?’
The girl kept quiet.
The man then pushed her aside and went towards his car.Another man standing nearby was watching the whole scene.

He came to the girl and said, ‘it was a good question dear, why don’t you do some work?’
The girl replied in an angry tone, ‘who said that I don’t work?’
‘I protect the sand beneath my feet from getting wet and I eat the sun’s rays to keep the atmosphere cool. The sand in return consoles me and the rays give me hope to survive.’
The man looked at the girl surprisingly. He then bought her dinner. The girl ate the food and thanked the man in return. The man left.
The girl followed the man. She wanted to know more about him. He was crossing the road. Suddenly, a car ran by him. But he remained untouched. He was like a transparent soul. The girl shouted in shock. The man turned back and looked. The girl was shocked. She didn’t have any idea about the whole thing.
The man smiled and suddenly his body turned into a figure of sand glowing in the sun’s rays.